being emotional and all that...

i dont know why, but im feeling so emotional today. i dont really know... i feel good, but at the same time im feeling so down. i can say that it is mixed emotions but why am i having this at this time of the day. i mean its still 10:40 in the morning and i just.... sigh! suddenly, one of the men that makes my heart skip a beat just stopped by my window and i just smiled at him and he gave it back. woah! hehe. i dont know if what i am really feeling right now is love. but if i say it is love, honestly speaking, i dont even know if i have that. my family said they love me, but i dont see and either feel it. a lot of people say that love does not necessarily make you feel good inside and make you feel like your the most luckiest person in the world. love sometimes have to hurt and that the pain that you feel would be the thing that would make you say that you want to go on in life. there are times too that love made feel so happy and that all of my problems just floated away from me and after a few hours, its just comes back right at yah. hehe. the stories i tell... i mean, it is really true. love makes me feel that way at times. i'll just have to say that, love really works in mysterious ways that it'll make you think that it so unpredictable, which is true. hehe. im bored right now. i dont know what to do i keep on thinking on a lot stuffs. school, my friends, my life... hmmm... i dont really have a clue on what to do with my life at this point. im so confused that it came to a point that i wanted to commit suicide, but if i commit suicide, it would be the dumbest thing that i could have ever done. i mean, suicide is not the solutions for having so many problems in life. even in the text messages that i get have those advices that commiting suicide is not the best thing or your escape route to a less problematic life. they say that they'd rather pray and leave everything to GOD and that they would put a lot of positivity in their life so that it would make them feel better. i've tried it but it didnt work for me. i guess it doesnt work right away if its still your first time. i dont know. but maybe later in my life it would work out. right?