NOW!
CURRENT MOOD: tired...bummed...confused?
i dont really know what to do. im still confused as hell. i have tried so many things in my head but none of them seems effective enough to satisfy me. what's worst is that, people are trying to tell me what to do with my life and that, in my opinion, is BULLSHIT.
who would ever want to be dictated to? who wants to follow orders that are not even doable?(except those who are working their asses out, big time, trying to make the most out of what they can do earning deserving pennies, cents, nickels and dime for all i care)
c'mon. cant you just please let me be for once? seriously, i am really getting tired of being here in this sick place where the only thing that people do for a living is that they diss each other off and they spread rumors of all sorts of stuff and that just aint cool.
and again, i am tired of making posts that are way too emotional. for the first time since i started posting emotional entries, i have decided to talk about something.
ever noticed those advertisements posted all over facebook? ever noticed those prediction stuff, astrology, numerology, whatever "-gy" word you can think of? well, i tried one just a couple of minutes ago and its something to do with cards. i forgot what they call that kind of "-gy" word but it says something about the roles of playing cards in your life. everyday (or so i think it is...im not really sure) they give you a set of five cards. each card represent something in your life for the next couple of days, weeks, months...even years and the card that came out on my set today disappoints me in one way or another.
i have a 5 of clubs. it says something good shit but i totally forgot about. dang. how can i continue this post if i forgot about what it said? hmpf...never mind. il just have to explain this one out before i would lose my thoughts.
anyways, i think it said something about having a good life ahead of me. im not really sure when exactly is it though. it doesnt really mean too that i will be the richest person on the face of the planet. it just said it that way or something that the 5 of clubs will do me good.
do me good...that sounds really interesting. but what disappoints me is that, so far, it has not been good for me. life has been like hell for me for the past few weeks and i have this feeling that it will continue on until next year, of which i am hoping will not happen because for all i know, i need every single ounce of luck and prayers in the world for all i care.
on the other hand, if the 5 of clubs will do me good, how come it never stopped my parents to decide that they will not send me to school this coming semester? fucked up as it sounds, but yeah. i am again ditching another whole semester because i did something that wasnt pleasing to their eyes. there is nothing i can do about it so i would have to skip that part of the story. what i have to say about that is that of what is mentioned at the beginning of the paragraph.
ungh...i just cant help it. i tried not to make a damn emotional post but look what ive got? sick!! i am sick and forever will be.
PS. my post dont make any sense...does it?
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